Chadminton

There are days when I want to say screw this and give it all up

There are days when I want to say screw this and give it all up. Go pick coffee by hand somewhere in a field, or live off land with nothing but a tent in a foreign land somewhere.
There are days when my meditation or sitting practice in the morning doesn't work and I'm just as anxious as when I woke up.
Days when people, clients, family members, colleagues, friends are disrespecting my boundaries, are projecting stuff onto me that feels like slime, are cranky or being needy and I just want to hide away and never speak to anyone again.
Days when I can feel all the little hooks and tentacles people want to put in me and I want to go hide far away from people and live alone in a cabin in the woods.
Days when people say mean things, when Facebook is overwhelming, when I am ultra sensitive to everything.
This is real life. It's not always a feel good instagram post.
But I always remember, if I wanted to do any of those things, I could. Because I am free to choose how I react to everything around me.
And there is something deeper that drives me that makes all the little bazillion annoying little things worth this journey...
Passion.
This inexplicable thing that pulls me forward, which my soul whispers to me. And allows me to tolerate a million little things that bump against my edges and grow me.
If you can make sure you connect to that passion, that purpose, that calling, every day, it makes all the annoying little things that grate against your sensitive soul bearable and worth it.
And should you ever decide enough is enough and you are going to go live a simpler life, picking coffee in Panama and living in a little hut with nothing but a few possessions, that is okay too.
There are no rules for how to do this life. Only what feels aligned for you. ?

 2021-10-26   Admin

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